The Realm is a sanctuary used as a place of relaxation and tranquility owned and used by its master – me. It is an extension of its master’s will and its existence is tied to his own.Unlike the log cabin described elsewhere in this blog it is located somewhere outside space-time in an unspecified location. And naturally, it is inspired by the TARDIS. Enjoy your visit….
Welcome to the Realm – come on in, close the door behind you and relax. You are among friends now. Here, let me help you with your coat. Allow me to get you a drink and afterwards, give you the grand tour.
What does it look like?
From the outside, the Realm has no fixed appearance and it is infinitely bigger on the inside than on the out – much like the TARDIS. It can take the shape of any object its master wishes and is often seen in the form of a huge blue and white-striped lighthouse hidden near a chalky cliff-face. It also has a cloaking device rendering it invisible (which can be left permanently switched on).
Is it a safe environment?
Yes. For one thing, it is indestructible and impregnable. In the event of an attempted break-in, it simply teleports to a new location, leaving the would-be burglars behind. It also possesses unspecified defences which are powerful enough to deflect armies. Its doors can withstand any assault even from nuclear weapons.
How can you get there?
Its master is able to reach its doors at will, in an instant and only he is able to open them. It can also be summoned to its master’s location whenever he chooses.
How does its space/time operate?
Time spent within the Realm has a non-equivalence with time spent in the ‘real’ world – thus years can be spent there without the person ageing at all, much like Narnia.
The Realm is infinitely large and frequently reconfigures itself since like a TARDIS it is semi-alive. Furthermore, its appearance to some extent matches its master’s moods.
What is in the Realm?
The Realm contains a vast number of rooms, containing unimaginable wonders, but only a small number of them are ever seen. There are also many hidden passages leading to other sections of the interior.
Among the main rooms are:
- Living-quarters including a comfortable lounge, master bedroom, dining area, spacious bathroom and kitchen. It also includes an old-style jukebox and sound-system (set up for vinyl, CDs and i-Pod dock) with an infinite library of records including classical, jazz and all kinds of rock. Its archive covers the earliest 19th Century sound recordings right up to the present day.
- A recreation area including a swimming pool, gym and pool table as well as an area for video-games with a huge collection and multiple consoles on which to play them.
- A colossal library on multiple-levels accessible by spiral-staircases including a copy of practically every book ever written, plus extensive DVD collection of films (including every sci-fi and horror flick ever made).The library is similar in principle to that of Borges’ labryinth except it is far easier to navigate and items can be found with ease – as can the exit.
- A cabinet of curiosities – a huge trophy room containing weird and wonderful objects from all periods in Earth’s history. Some are easily identifiable, others are a complete mystery. A complete inventory is contained in the library. Somewhere.
- Henry the supercomputer – who has his own room and is fully-interactive with advanced AI and responsiveness. His default personality is a cross between Alfred Pennyworth from Batman and a benevolent version of MAX from the Eagle’s ‘Thirteenth Floor’ comic strip. His computer banks contain information on any given subject, plus he plays a mean game of chess / draughts.
- A time-machine portal capable of transporting the realm to any point in Earth’s history. This works in a similar fashion to the Holodeck on Star Trek the Next Generation and can be used to explore any era or meet any person contained in the databanks.
- An art-gallery – containing replicas of every major painting produced by Western art from the Middle Ages onwards – divided into sections according to time-period. This is inspired loosely by the Shadow Gallery from Alan Moore’s ‘V for Vendetta.’
- Store-rooms – containing clothing, equipment and tools for any occasion plus walk-in wardrobes etc.
- A large meditation-chamber – filled with candles and scented oils, perfect for relaxation, astral-projection etc.
- Robbie, the robot butler – (named after, naturally, Robbie from ‘The Forbidden Planet’ – a classic steampunk design). This is an extension of Henry the computer and can bring the master anything he desires. Also makes a first-rate cup of Earl Grey tea.